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The Two-Day-Old Story
14 March 2003
4 11:47

Oh, yes, there's more where that came from.

This will be installment two from two days ago, hopefully less depressing and more narratively exciting than the last. I guess that makes this the second entry of the day two days ago. Is it really necessary to point that out, though? All sorts of people make a point of putting "Xth Entry of the Day" (where X is a real number greater than one) on their multiple-entry days. I figure if anyone's actually interested in reading this, he or she can scroll back through the entries to see what has been added without being noticed or check the "Older Entries" page, not that my titles are all that memorable or coherent, though I do try to make them relate in some way to the entry. I'm discovering other favourite diaries slowly, so I won't say who they are. I've already expressed my dismay at ryan8-5cut's closing. There are others who I wish would update more often, as I enjoy reading them, but I'll wait. Traumatease is foremost among those (I wasn't going to mention him directly in an entry until I'd finally managed to read everything he's posted and confirmed that I hold him in high regard, which I have and do), but I understand all too well that he's off being a new Da-Da, and I congratulate him heartily on that...More of my thoughts on him later. It's nearly lunch-time, and I feel as though I could eat the world, yet I have with me in the office only a sandwich, and I've sworn off going out for lunch in order to save money, and so that I'm less inclined to munch throughout the evening after an early dinner, I'm waiting for lunch 'til 1 p.m. I swear I love food. Eating is an enormous pleasure for me; it's lucky my metabolism is fairly forgiving and I'm fairly active so I don't end up three feet wide (I'm not even three feet in circumference at the waist, thank you). Moving on...Backwards, ever backwards...

I am single again. No consolation is necessary. I would feel more saddened by this state of affairs if not for the fact that I feel Chip and I are somehow closer friends now that we're no longer officially dating. It's as though all manner of pressure-filled expectations and requirements have been lifted. We had an uncomfortable conversation on the phone Friday night as a result of bad communication between us and the feelings which were building inside me as a result of our inability of late to make time for each other, our failure to "act like boyfriends," as I put it. We agreed to think things over during the night and discuss them over or after lunch on Saturday, which we did, pleasantly and maturely. As a result, we're now making a point of seeing each other to do fun things together, as we did in the beginning, when we first met and started hanging out. Last Saturday night, I went out for dinner and margaritas and pool-playing with him and his friends. (I love to play pool, though I must admit I'm terrible at it. I do manage to sink at least a couple shots per game, though, and sometimes, when I try something that looks absurdly difficult, I can hear Tara's voice in my ear, encouraging me as to how I ought to line up the shot. She'd be pleased to know I still hear her echoing to me from Southwest Georgia, where I hope she and her husband are very happy people, as she really is a phenomenal person, and I can't imagine he'd be otherwise.) I slept over at Chip's place. We cuddled, as I wish more close friends felt comfortable enough to do. He is really wonderful, and I can't express how great it is to feel that close to someone.

Sunday, we stayed in bed 'til nearly noon. I, obviously, did not go to church. I feel bad about this, but with the choir out, I can scarcely bear to go. It isn't the same place, of late; it seems rather cacophonous and disjointed. Others share my opinion. The service simply doesn't work as well as it is at present. It makes me think of what Heaven might be like if all the Angels forgot how to sing.

I am possessed of an abiding desire for some form of escapism, but I lack a consistent source. It's probably just as well. We all know why.

On Tuesday afternoon, I went to Tycoon's and knocked out a few tunes on the piano during Happy Hour. (Started with the piano solo from the end of Tori's "Leather" just to get a feel for the piano, then played Lucinda Williams's "Passionate Kisses", Lyle Lovett's "God Will", a slightly syncopated version of "I Can See Clearly Now", Mary-Chapin Carpenter's "Shut Up and Kiss Me", Tom Waits's "Ol' '55", maybe something else, then wandered through an instrumental version of "As Time Goes By," just for kicks...All songs that seemed to suit the place. The owner came out, stuffed some money in my hand (for all of 15 minutes' entertainment which I thought was just an audition?!), said people seemed to like me and he'd give me a call on nights he needed someone to sub in for the regular guys. (I knew going in that they weren't actively looking for anyone, as they only have music on Friday and Saturday, and they have consistent guys who come in for those nights and play synths or guitars with drum machines as their backup, which is not really my style, though I've done it before and could do it again. He also confided that business is not so good these days; they used to have music on Thursday nights, too, but no more, and the lease is coming up, and he's not sure if he wants to renew or move. This information bothered me enormously, as I love that place, so I'm going to start trying to drag friends there as often as possible, and encourage others to patronize the joint. Maybe I'll go back and propose that I come in one day a week and play for Happy Hour just for tips or something; that would suit me just fine and would get me back into playing publicly, though my music tends to be more suited to smoky late-night environments...We'll see.)

I've developed a habit lately of falling asleep at a decent hour, and getting up with or before the sun, which is really a lot of fun. Add to this that I've started making myself coffee before going into the office, and even eating breakfast, and we seem to have the beginnings of some new and healthy habits. I think next week I'll start adding a new healthy habit: the much-touted fitness centre which I've not visited since my return to this complex; it's time for me to get 'round to being who I've always wanted.

I'll close with an advertisement: If you're in New Haven, hit Tycoon's for lunch or dinner or drinks or all of the above. It may seem a little pricey, but they'll feed you probably more than you can possibly manage to eat in a sitting. The address is 4 Orange St. The owners have a great sense of humour, so the ambience is quirky, but classy. And as you're walking in the door, wave up to the guy sitting in the window on the top floor of the building directly above; he might well be me. ;-P

As I was finishing lunch in the Indian restaurant (I won't name them 'cause they're not my favourite...My fave is Royal India, at the corner of Howe where Broadway turns into Whalley), someone said to one of the staff, "Have a happy day," and I wondered, "HOW?!" The answer: We MUST persevere. We SHALL overcome.

r

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