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Starting Here, Starting Now...Or Yesterday Today is day two of the rest of my life. Yesterday went remarkably well as day one, and I figure if I can make it past the first three (though maybe it'll take six), I'll be able to do this. Let me explain "this". 1. Drastic carbohydrate reduction, Atkins-style, in the name of ripping off a significant amount of fat fast. For the first two weeks, no sugar, and only minimal carbs (less than 20 grams per day, which really is a bit frightening for an Irish lad like me who loves his potatoes and pasta and bread and has a bit of a sweet tooth), probably found chiefly in nuts and dairy products. This means I'm eating a lot of tuna, eggs, chicken, pork, beef, seafood, cheese, and the like, which I typically don't so much, so of course, my digestive system is busy shouting, "What the fuck d'you think you're doing to me?!" After the first two weeks, or maybe three, if the desired results aren't coming quite as quickly as I'd have them do, I'll start adding "naughty" things back in, little by little. You can bet that booze is gonna be the first thing back; not only does it contain no carbohydrates, strictly speaking (alcohol is merely a waste by-product of the fermentation of carbohydrate matter), but it provides a number of health benefits, chief among which is keeping me a bit better-balanced and nicer, at least when consumed in moderation. The effect of this plan is to be augmented, nay, and even bested by... 2. Fiendish amounts of exercise. Much as I love one of my friends' philosophy that, "There is only ever one reason to exert oneself," it's just not that easy for me. I mean, I don't have THAT much sex! So as soon as I get out of bed, a little light yoga gets the circulation going, stretches the muscles out, and helps to centre and focus me. Then, I trot to the fitness centre and follow a three-day rotating schedule that goes something like this: Day One: Day Two: Day Three: 3. Needless to say, I'm not smoking. As I mentioned above, I'm also not drinking alcohol, at least for now, and I am drinking huge amounts of water. I'm taking my vitamins like a good boy, flushing my sinuses with saline solution at least daily (with this), and eating at least a tablespoonful of garlic per day. I'm trying to be thorough, here, right? It's not that I'm fat. I don't even think the stupid asshole gymbunny musclehead faggot queens would call me that. I've just been dissatisfied, hating myself for not "being all that I can be" for quite some time, now, and being around the mostly gorgeously-put-together drama students (the actors, anyway) has heightened that sensation. I'm getting ready to dive into my next project, a rather condensed production of Cabaret in which who knows what I'll be wearing as the pianist and musical director, but I figure I damn well better look sexy if the MC is to say, "Even the piano player is beautiful," or something to that effect. I figure, too, that now, before I move to Manhattan, is the perfect time to do it. Okay, admittedly, if you're me, there's no perfect, or even appropriate time to eschew hedonism, what with obligatory cook-outs and drinking-binges, but like Jon Brion (who, by the way, is a fucking genius and whose Mommy I'm proud to call a friend, 'cause she's a truly fantastic Lady) says in the opening track to his album, Meaningless, "You gotta start somewhere..." r
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